Ireland D0+1 - Back to my family roots!

My parents wanted to squeeze in one last family trip before the boys start getting married (and just barely made it!) and decided on Ireland! So we got tickets, my mom booked some airBNBs, and here we go!

Day 0:
We raced past the terminator and the dawn raced towards us, so I tried to take a timelapse of our 5pm to 5am flight. It was going to be a metaphor for how short our night felt. But instead I rolled over while trying to sleep, caught the charging cable, and launched my camera into the darkness. This is a better metaphor. 5pm->5am, and no sleep was slept.

Day 1:
We picked up our rental car, got on the wrong side of the road, and drove to Kilkenny! There's a castle! (This is going to be a theme, I fasdfinf love castles.) It's 7am and Nothing is open! We wandered (if we kept moving it was easier to stay awake) down to the canal and found an open confectionery, and our first authentic Irishman. He was drunk, shirtless, wearing a jacket and telling us all about things to do while accidentally swearing constantly. The rest of the family got coffee, and I got a laugh. So far so good.

Adam took this picture better than the rest of us

We continue wandering around the canal, see some dogs, we all take the same picture, and we wander about until the castle grounds open! The grounds are pretty good, and by the time we finish our makeshift tour the bakery is open! Pan au chocolat for the road and a Coca Cola - the nectar of the gods.

On the way to the Priory

After Kilkenny we went to the Priory at Kells! We expected a few random ruins, and at first mistook a random wall and crumbled barn for the Priory. However, when we figured out the map we found (after a hike past photogenic bridges and some mills) extensive and relatively intact ruins! It was huge, several levels tall, and half collapsed. Unfortunately they blocked off all the intact internal passages but it was still awesome to wander around and take photos and etc. I considered going for it, but the last thing you want to do is get arrested for being stuck halfway through some too-small embrasure on the first day of vacation. You have to save that for the end!  It must be amazing to leave nearby, as the locals kept passing through walking their dogs, and someone grazes their sheep there. You know, in a fortress (1193-1540) that was older than our entire country when it was abandoned decades before the Mayflower was even built.

    

Painfully bright sky, preposterously huge buildings. Pretty true to life.

After the Priory, we went to Waterford, where they make $uper fancy cut glass crystal things! We got lunch at a sandwich place (stir fry beef veggie wrap - quite good. And coke. Always good.) Then we got slightly lost (We went to the Waterford Distillery, not Waterford Crystal - ooops) before going to the crystal factory. The tours were all booked, so we toured the large showroom instead, marveling at the prices as much as the workmanship ($70 - $40,000 euros). Holy cow. Between that and the video (Imagine this with an accent) we felt like we'd achieved 90% of the reward and did not need to wait 90 minutes for the next available tour, so we headed onward! No time to wait when waiting means  fallling asleep on your feet....

Next stop was the exciting exotic venue of Tesco. If you are unfamiliar with Tesco... it's like a Walmart, only smaller, European, and not quite as terrible.  Adam needed a SIM for his phone, and while we were there he insisted that we impulse-buy some "Tesco" Lager.

Adam again with a barely better
copy of a photo we all took

Back in the car we really struggled with staying awake between stops and whether we should give up and go to the B&B or whether to go to the tourist-trap that is Blarney castle and kiss the stone. We decided since we were going by it anyways that this was our best shot, so we should go for it!  As someone who has heard "Blarney" used as a euphemism for "Bullshit" their entire life, this was a treat as my mind automatically made the substitution for the first hour.  "The Bullshit Castle tour starts here" - "This way to the Bullshit River" - "Here's the legend of the Bullshit Stone" - "Get your commemorative Bullshit photo!"


It was actually an amazing stop - no Blarney!  Really nice grounds, decent caves, and a great castle! We got in line at the "you are 30 minutes from kissing the Blarney stone" mark and slowly wound our way up to the top of the castle, checking out all the different rooms we passed, sticking our heads out random windows, etc etc. 29 minutes later, we were there! The top of the castle is high enough that  leaning over the railings gave me some vertigo, but there were handholds for the stone itself so there was zero vertigo there-  for me. Apparently, it used to have no handholds, no protective grate, and an actual (though minute) risk of death. The olden days were so cool. We all kissed it, mom freaked only slightly, and we wound back down the castle, checking out more rooms, arrow slots, murder holes, and poop chutes. It was actually really fun. Then we checked out the waterfall (gimmicky), the dungeons (neat, mostly caves, 36 short hunched over steps deep), and headed out. On the way out Dad made a joke about Blarney stones (pointing to the river stones) which reminded me I needed to get an Irish rock for my girlfriend, so I grabbed the perfect Blarney stone from the riverbed. All in all it was a great stop and possibly even worth the $20 ticket price. To be fair, the free priory totally threw off our value scales.

Bullshit Caves!

At this point, the sun was setting and we were crashing off the Adrenalin that had fueled us to this point. We drove to the town our airBNB was in, got take-out pizza at a restaurant, navigated the swarms of cars that were there for some street festival, and finally had dinner back at our air bnb with Tesco Lager. It was, to no surprise, horrible. Pizza was great though. We recapped the day and shared our favorite pictures in an informal "picture of the day" competition.

I'm amazed how much we did today... and all on up-to-two hours of sleep. The roads are narrow and like to surprise you with turns, but not nearly as bad as we'd been lead to believe - our minivan is fine as long as we're careful. And now my Tesco Lager is done, so I am as well. G'night!

Thanks random couple!